Sunday, October 20, 2013

To My Husband On Our Anniversary

1 year of marriage. Where has the time gone? More importantly, 6 years together, where has THAT time gone? Well, I can tell you. It has been the most uplifting, life changing, happy, beautiful, brutal, amazing, crazy, challenging, and rewarding time of my entire existence. 

The man I met 6 years ago has evolved with me into the man I always knew he was; and in turn, he has ripped out the woman he always knew I was deep inside. Now, the man I married one year ago, that man, THIS man, is the man I dreamed of. The man I could never imagine in my life. The one who could push me to my limits. The one who no matter what I want to do, will ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS support me. Will always say, yes, do it! No matter how crazy my mind and thoughts may be, he supports me. This man loves me unconditionally. Imagine that. A love without conditions. A man who has never left my side. A man who has never once threatened to leave me. A man who despite whatever hard times I have personally gone through or whatever challenges we have faced in our relationship throughout 6 years, has down right loved me. 

This man, my husband, will do whatever it takes to make me happy. He is the hardest worker I've ever seen. He works hard for our family. Not only this, but he truly shows me a great time. He wants to experience life with me, his wife, to the fullest. From vacations to concerts, to fancy dinners, to visiting the latest dive food stand, we do it all. Together, baby. 

We have ripped each other's hearts out to find where there were tiny, unbroken pieces, forced each other to really feel that pain, and helped each other place those mended hearts back together and back where they belong; with each other. Neither of us are close to perfect, but we have slowly fixed ourselves and each other throughout the years. 

Not only have I been given this beautiful man, I have been given something that has overfilled my life with even more unconditional love, I have been given my son. My Johnny boy. This man could not have given me anything in life that is more precious than my son. And let me tell you something, there is a quote that goes something like this, "don't marry a man unless you'd be proud to have a son just like him." And if my son turns out to be half the man that my husband is, I would eternally be thankful. My husband is an amazing father. The love for Johnny, you see throughout his whole being. You can see his soul when that little boy smiles at him. 

To the man who shows me true honor and respect, a man who is selfless and loving, here's to many more years, a lot more fun, and infinite happiness! 

Happy 1st wedding anniversary, Sweets!!!!

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Just Some Thoughts

Lately I've been wondering. Thinking. Wondering. Thinking some more.

Why the hell do we have to place so much pressure on ourselves to be busy? To always be doing something? Even when you say, okay I'm taking the day off and doing nothing. Do you ever really do, nothing? Like, nothing nothing? Have you ever let yourself BE with your thoughts? You know, the good, the bad, and even the ugly? Have you let  your brain just chill and kind of let you know what's going on? How it's feeling?

I know for me personally that is a very rare and seldom occasion. Especially now in the day and age of such tremendous technology. I know that I am guilty of having my phone in hand, a LOT. However, throughout the day, I do try to keep that at a minimum when I'm with my son. Of course, I do take a lot of pictures. But, is that bad? Hell to the no it's not. First, it's my prerogative to do what I want and when I want. I love to take pictures of my child. I don't ever want to miss a moment or even forget what that moment feels like. If when I get old I can't remember, I will have these pictures with me. And not only that, but my son will be able to have these memories for his family, and to pass on. So, in that instance, technology is a beautiful thing.

However, there are times when I'm bored and Johnny is napping. So I keep myself busy with blogging, housework, or crafts. But there are times when I'm like, oh I'm bored, let's surf the internet. Facebook. Instagram. Poshmark. Twitter. You name it. I find myself mindlessly scrolling. Is that okay? Of course it is! I have interests and hobbies in life and I like to read articles on the internet, I like to keep up with my family who is far, friends who I haven't seen in a while. But it's also good and necessary to be alone with your thoughts, so that you don't lose yourself.

Social media is such a blessing in my eyes, although I don't think I ever would have made it out of High School with it. But social media can also be dangerous. It's human nature to compare and contrast ourselves with others. Jealousy is also a natural feeling, but it's important to not let that take over your life. Once in a while, unplug. Unwind. Live in the now. Often times I see people whom I look up to in the fitness and business industry, and find myself truly inspired to be a better version of me. But there are also days where looking at this can get me down, too. That's when I know it's time to unplug.

You see, there is a lot that goes on in real life behind pictures. Just because you got that "perfect" moment captured, does not mean that it is indeed all sunshine and fucking rainbows, ya feel me?

It's important to remember that you are enough. Your life is enough. Your family is enough. If you're feeling inspired, that's wonderful! You should be! But, just because someone made a pie that looks like a Turkey from Pinterest certainly doesn't mean that you're doing a bad job or not good enough. It just means that maybe, some day, you will make a pie that looks like, well, a pie.